Lundi!!!

I used to have a French teacher named Mr. Barney. My name was Cecile in that class because he allowed us to choose a French name for the school year. I loved the class because it was so empowering that I could speak a different language. Mr. Barney always started each class by reciting the names of the days and having us "repetez s'il vous plait..." He would get an impish grin on his face when he said, "Lundi!" and as he went all the way up to the end his voice would get less and less happy, because it meant that soon we would have the weekend, where there would be no French class. But we'd come back around to "Lundi" again and he was all happy again, because it was the start of a whole week of French class. What a great teacher he was. He had little relevant fashion sense and had an elfin face, but his enthusiasm about teaching us French will last me a lifetime - of looking forward to every Lundi.

I am lucky that I am a positive person overall. I maintain a conservative affect about my joy in general, but my attitude remains positive, hopeful. I still am unemployed. A major employer where I have been pooling many of my resumes has just announced that they are holding off on much of the hiring they usually do. I am disappointed in that, but I remain hopeful. I pray for change. I pray for help. Something will happen. Like many persons with Masters' Degrees, I feel torn between finding a job that is clearly my vocation, like church ministry or chaplaincy, and just finding any job that will at least pay the bills.

Sometimes I don't know which way to turn because I know I should be a chaplain. I have that hope and faith. But I also have no idea just how I am going to pay for my rent on December 1st. I have already taken much money out of retirement in order to live, but I can't keep doing that. Something has to change and I don't know how much I have to change in myself in order to fit into the world around me, and find a way to make money. I don't know what to do unless I hear something from the hospice organization, which I thought would be soon. It could be that I am expecting something too soon, or that they are now having trouble figuring out what to do in order to hire me. I hope and pray that this pans out. Please keep me in my prayers. It sounded like I was a shoe-in according to the way the interview went. I believe I have done everything that I should do. I was given a very positive reaction by the people in my interview. So what's the hold up? It could be that they want me full time but are presently afraid they have to offer me just part time. It could also be that they have had to readjust to other possible issues that have come up since my interview on Wednesday last week. It could also be that the president doesn't know that the interviewer said I would hear from them on Friday, just as the reverse happened in setting up the interview and I heard from them a day later than expected. Maybe they have decided to use this week as a "buffer" week to just make sure they say good bye to the former chaplain and her presence, which is also possible. They may need a little time to prepare information or a final salary offer, or they found someone they liked a lot more.

There are simply too many possible reasons for why I haven't heard from the hospice folks yet. It's a small company and the staff there tend to be "jack of all trades." I think that they are having some internal financial issues, although many of these people do, and I hope and pray that ultimately their patients, families and staff do not suffer because of it.

Sometimes, you just have to say, "Lundi!" and hope for the best!